Saviour

"I never meant to be the one who kept you from the dark
But now I know my wounds are sewn because of who you are"

Lily looked out the window of her room at Hogwarts, down upon the lawn below. Many students were out playing in the recently warmed weather. She could just see Severus on the edge of the grounds by the Forbidden Forrest. He was with Avery and Mulciber again. How she detested them! They were nothing but trouble and were dragging her dear Sev down with them.

She knew she shouldn't care. He had called her a Mudblood! But as much as she pretended not to care around people, she cared deeply. She loved him, she always had. He had been her best friend since she could remember, and losing him hurt like nothing else.

She had a bad feeling about where he would end up once he was through at Hogwarts. The Death Eaters were always looking for new recruits and she had no doubt that Sev would take that path. Lily also knew that she would never be able to stop him, especially now that she had pushed him away.

~Two years later~

Lily gazed at the faces around her. Today was graduation day. She found her parents, though her sister was nowhere to be seen. She found all of her older friends there too, smiling at her and waving. She waved back and continued scanning the room.

She noticed that Sev's parents were nowhere to be found, and wondered how things were in their house. She knew his father was abusive, though he wouldn't admit it. His mother was submissive to his father out of fear.

Severus had often dreamed of rescuing her from his father and leaving, bringing her to Hogsmeade, or some other wizarding city where she would be safe.

Lily found Sev with the other Slytherins, surrounded by Avery, Mulciber, and Lucius Malfoy among others. They were talking quietly and pointing at Sev's left arm.

All the color drained from Lily's face. So he had done it. Between the end of term and today, he had received the mark.
She felt as though she was going to pass out. Clutching the chair in front of her tightly, she looked over at her first love again. He still had the same long black hair framing his face and the pail, sallow skin. But he looked far more detached then he used to, like he was life's pawn instead of an active participant.

How she wanted to just go over and shake him! To return him to how he had been at nine and ten, so excited about the life he had been chosen for! It killed her to see her one and only true best friend going down this dark path, but even worse was knowing she could have changed it. All those years ago when she pushed him away… if only she had been more forgiving, more understanding. Sure, it was a horrible thing of him to say, but he was her best friend! How could she have let this happen?
   
Dumbledore moved to stand behind the podium and welcomed everyone, calling the Griffyndore's up to the steps first. James came over and took Lily's hand as they walked up, the hand that now bore a ring, James's ring, on her slender ring finger. It glittered in the light as she stood to receive high honors from the headmaster.

When they were through, Lily caught Severus' eyes, and saw tears shining in the darker pair. This was really it. Their time at Hogwarts was over.

Lips were on hers all of a sudden, and she subconsciously registered that they belonged to James. Severus's eyes darked and he shot her a look of pure venom, then looked away.

Lily almost moved away from James to go to Sev, explain everything, but she knew it would be pointless. She allowed herself to be pulled off the stairs by a joyful James, the man who would be her husband in less than a year.

"I will take this burden on and become the holy one
But remember I am human and I'm bound to sing this song"

Severus's eyes locked with the green ones he loved so much. She stood near the center of the group after receiving her honors. There was something in the light pair that made more tears flood his eyes, though he would not let them fall.

The weight of exactly what he had done crushed him in that instant. He was a Death Eater now. He was even farther away from Lily then he had been before. She would never forgive him now, she couldn't. The hope he had held onto for so long melted away. It had nearly killed him when Lily pushed him away. She was his whole world, his best friend and the one he loved more than his own life.

When he took the mark, he hadn't realized the enormity of what he was taking on, what he was losing. His life now revolved around serving the most powerful dark wizard of all time. He knew he would regret the decision, but he needed something to live for. It used to be Lily, but since she turned her back on him… he had nothing. No one. Nowhere to go.

The Dark Lord provided him with a home, a feeling of safety and power. But joining the Death Eaters also meant losing every tie he had left with Lily, and the rest of the wizarding world.

No, it didn't make him invincible, and he was bound to regret it, but it was too late now to look at that. All he had to do is keep moving forward, one step at a time.

James leaned over and kissed Lily full on the lips. Severus felt hatred spike through his very being. He looked away, unable to bear it any longer. She was in his past now. He rubbed his left forearm and returned his attention to the ceremony.

"So hear my voice,
Reminds you not to bleed
I am here"

Lily lay on the floor inside her sons room. James was by the door, also motionless and staring blankly at the scene before him. Dead. Her husband was dead. Her son was dead.  And soon she would be too.

Someone burst through the door and gasped, running over to her. The man dressed in all black knelt down next to her and pulled her into his arms. Teardrops landed on her face and hands as the man held her close and sobbed.

"Severus…" she breathed.

The man opened his red rimmed eyes. "Lily…" he stared down at her so lovingly.

"Severus… help… I'm…. dying…" Lily chocked the words out, barely audible. But he heard. Her best friend heard.

"Alive… how can this be?"
"The snake…"

Severus seemed to notice the fang marks on her neck for the first time and gasped. "No…"

Lily's breath slowed down and Severus knew she was close to death. Thinking quickly he pulled a vial from his robes. Anti-venom. He had been carrying it since a few years ago, when he joined the Dark Lord's forces.

"Lily, here, this will help."

The woman parted her lips just slightly and he poured the potion down her throat.

Pulling her back against his chest, he rocked her slowly. "Oh Lily, my dear Lily, please pull through this… for me… I need you, Lily. I always have. I love you more than my own life. Please…"

Tears flowed freely down his face. He needed this woman in his life. James and the baby were too far gone, but Lily was still clinging with all of her strength to the life she craved to keep.

Severus carried her over to the bed, not caring that she and James had once shared it. He lay her down gently and climbed up next to her, curling up around her slight figure and praying, to whatever God may be out there, to spare her life, let her stay with him though he knew he didn't deserve it.

He talked to her the whole time, telling her how much he needed her. Telling her that he loved her. Confessing all of those things he had kept inside for years. Hoping with all his heart that she could still hear his voice, cling to that even when so close to death.

There, in that room, he promised her to never again leave her.

"Saviour! Will be there
When you are feeling alone, ohhh
A saviour, for all that you do
So you live freely without their harm"

Hours later, Severus didn't know how long, Lily's breath became stronger. Her pulse quickened. He sat up and took her hand, staring down at her.

After what seemed like a lifetime, her eyes opened. She gazed up at the man before her, looking as though he had lived a hundred years in the last day or two.

"Oh thank you! Oh Lily! I thought I was too late…" he crushed her to him and sobbed again.

She, though still weak, wrapped his arms around the crying man and held on tight. "Shh… shh, Severus, it's alright. I'm ok… I;m ok…"

"I was… so afraid…" He seemed to choke on his words as they came out.

"Oh my dear Sev…" Lily hugged him tighter and cried too, cried for the loss of her son, her husband, and cried out of joy for the return of the one person she had ever truly loved.

After a while, Severus looked into Lily's eyes, the eyes he had seen for years in both his best and worst dreams. "I promise you, Lily, that I will never again let anything happen to you. I will keep you safe from harm for the rest of your life."

He leaned down slowly, and sealed his words with a kiss.